


Shh (Etiquette)

by ShamanicShaymin



Category: Mother 2: Gyiyg no Gyakushuu | EarthBound
Genre: Awkward Sexual Situations, Breaking The Rules, Breaking the Fourth Wall, Crack Treated Seriously, Cunnilingus, F/M, Fluff and Crack, Friendsex, Friendship/Love, Fuck Or Die, Inspired by Chatlog, More like Fuck Or Fail Mu Training but hey, Oral Sex, Romantic Friendship, Self-Discovery, Silence Kink, Vaginal Sex, Woman on Top
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-03-21
Updated: 2008-03-21
Packaged: 2018-04-01 04:19:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4005652
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShamanicShaymin/pseuds/ShamanicShaymin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As punishment for teaching forbidden PSI, Poo is sentenced to one last Mu trial... one Paula may be able to help him with.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Shh (Etiquette)

**Author's Note:**

> This old fic has a lot of sentimental value for me. Initially, a friend and I were joking around on AIM, fangirling and making fun of Prince Poo because we loved him. Then the jokes turned serious, and I ended up writing a love scene between Poo and Paula. How we got there, I'm not sure how it happened. But after writing it, I found myself shipping Poo/Paula hardcore, falling in love with their dynamics and how well their personalities meshed together. I also loved Poo even more than I already did, being exposed to his vulnerable side and just how sweet he is. ;; Since chatlogs don't translate well in fiction, I converted the beginning and ending to better match with the prose sex scene, hence why the beginning and ending feel rough and awkward compared to the middle. :P
> 
> My friend later drew art, which I colored with her permission here: http://insanepurin.deviantart.com/art/Collab-Poo-x-Paula-Shh-64624807

“So Prince Poo. Is it true you taught your friend this new ritual?”  
“Master, I-I didn't _teach_ it. It just... slipped out.”  
“Accident, I assume?”  
“Yes Master.”  
“Did you say anything about what happens in Deathly Hallows?”  
“No Master.”

Poo’s master sighed as he spoke to his disciple from the throne. _He lies. He told everyone._

“Hmm…” The old man rubbed his chin. “Apparently, you can’t keep your mouth shut, can you?”  
“…”  
“I thought up JUST the perfect ‘punishment’ for you. Take it as you will, you will see it as punishment or apart of Mu Training.”  
“Yes Master…”  
“Poo, you must fold my socks. With your own feet.”

Without another word, the prince bowed and set off for another room in the palace. His glance was wary; it was usual of his Master to assign a menial task as a warm-up for the true ordeal. But what it was, it was anyone’s guess…

~

“LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. I AM GIVING OUT THIS ANNOUNCEMENT FOR ALL TO HEAR.” 

A feverish crowd gathered around the front of the palace, a man speaking into his phone like it was a giant megaphone to command the town’s attention. Paula Polestar approached with caution, her blue eyes gazing nervously like she were to take the wrong step and fall through Dalaam’s clouds. What was going on?

“THE PRINCE WILL BE CONDUCTING MU TRAINING INSIDE THIS VERY PALACE. PRINCE POO, WILL YOU PLEASE STAND UP?”

There was a roar of applause that bellowed in their hearts. There stood Prince Poo, on display for the country to see. It overwhelmed Paula to see her older friend stoic to the cries of female fans, bearing so much blaze and ruckus it was enough to make HER feel woozy. _Something is wrong…_

“INSIDE THIS PALACE, PRINCE POO WILL ESCORT A WOMAN WITH HIM TO HIS ROOM AND MAKE LOVE TO HER.”

Among the excited screams, the blonde gaped in alarm, turning flustered and red. _Wh-What!?_ In the corner of her eye, she thought she saw the prince become frigid, his face pale and drained of color.

“NOT TO SAY WE'RE WITHOUT PROTECTION OF COURSE. CONDOMS ARE AVAILABLE, AND WE'VE GOT TOYS TO CHALLENGE THE PRINCE TO BOOT! MINORS ARE ADVISED TO MOVE TO THE BACK OF THE CROWD. COME BACK WHEN YOU'RE OF AGE. NOW HERE'S THE CATCH! DURING THIS COURTLY SESSION, THE WOMAN IS FREE TO VOICE HER PLEASURE. HOWEVER, AS FOR THE PRINCE, **HE IS NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE A NOISE.”**

If before hadn’t raised enough interest (which already did), this was the clincher. Sick with dread, Paula wished the announcement would be done and over with as soon as possible. This was appalling! How… how could they…!

“MAKE A CHOICE, PRINCE! BUT REMEMBER! IF YOU DON'T CHOOSE, OR IF YOU MAKE THE SLIGHTEST MOAN, YOU FAIL YOUR TRAINING.”

A boom reverberated among the crowd, and the man returned the phone atop his head and hung up.

If the prince had been overwhelmed, he certainly hid it well. Even in his stoic front, one could detect the solemnity in his eyes. Like a timid forest creature under spotlight, he stared past the faces of women around, waving their arms and fighting for his attention. Poo froze upon finding Paula, a punch in the gut twisting his insides. Speechless, he could only watch her in confusion. How should he react? What on earth could he possibly say?

Keeping a collected demeanor, Paula took a step toward him.

The prince blinked, unable to believe what he just saw. Was it a coincidence? Still, the girl in the pink dress continued making timed steps, making sure none of the other ladies noticed. It was a dizzying sensation…

“Paula…” Tentatively reaching for his friend, the crowd distanced themselves as Paula took his hand. “May I escort you?”

~

“ I-I'm sorry about this...” Paula apologized, doleful eyes gazing into Poo’s.  
“For what?”  
“Well… for what happened in Deep Darkness. You know…”  
“It was an accident, Paula. I was careless to have taught you the forbidden PSI.”  
“If Ness and I did a thing like that, we’d simply be banned! I didn't think such consequences for you would be losing your virginity...”

Tapestries of art adorned the golden walls of Poo’s room, but Paula couldn’t bear to look at them, burying her face in her hands.

“It... it shouldn't be punishment.” Her voice choked up, wincing at selected words. “It should be something special. God, they... they made you sound like a womanizer out there. Just picks whatever woman he pleases... you're not like that!”  
“It’s… It's... it's nothing to do with that." Poo trembled, unsure what to do with the crying Paula. How was he going to be of comfort without being dishonest or unintentionally frightening her? “It's a trial for Mu training. Apart of my… development as a man.”  
“Staying silent under sex?”  
“...Paula, I didn't want this.”

The blonde sniffled, wiping her eyes. Of course he didn’t. Knowing how vulnerable the prince was, she gently held his hands to comfort him, astonished by what she felt.

“Your hands...” She gazed at Poo with eyes of wonder, and the prince consented as her fingers stroked his arms. “Y-You’re gone. But you’re here…”  
“Yes…”

What kind of sacrifices did Poo make in preparation for meeting the rest of the Chosen 4? When he was summoned to learn PSI Starstorm? Paula closed her eyes against Poo’s chest, listening to his heartbeat. If she heard closer, she could hear the beat of the Sound Stone… she swayed tenderly, a soft peace soothing her.

“Mm… you’re so strong.” She smiled. “A gentle strong. Your Master’s taught you a lot.”

For a moment, Poo said nothing. Then he pulled her in his arms and hugged her.  
With a squeak of surprise, Paula had no time to react to this awkward moment. Poo never held anybody and was uneasy when it came to touchy-feely stuff. Even in his arms, she could feel him quiver, like he was claustrophobic and that he was squeezing himself into submission. With a kind gesture, the blonde relaxed the prince in her arms, hands on his shoulders as confidence returned to her.

“Well...” She whispered. “We might as well get started, okay?”  
“…Of course.”

With this mutual agreement, she brought him into a kiss, startling Poo a little, but calming him down as her hands brush his neck. An exotic flavor filled her senses and they pulled away gently before coming back for more. Paula yelped as she was swept off her feet, Poo carrying her to a large bed with a velvet-red quilt decorated with gilded dragons. She spread her arms, admiring the amount of space and Poo on top of her. She didn't even notice his hand stroking her hair, her ribbon undone and tangled among his fingers.

Her buttons were undone and parted, revealing the white lace of her bra. Her hands gripped the black belt, untying it until it coiled around Poo's feet like an eel. The prince's breath panted deeper, taking the bow of Paula's white sash and letting it fall like silver to her sides, fixing the knot until it splayed freely on the bed. Paula giggled, parting Poo's gi and feeling his chest with her hands. It felt tantalizing, feeling skin she couldn't see, but that made it all the more exciting. Unfortunately, all clothes had to go...

She pulled down the cloth from his shoulders, leaving the prince topless with sleeves dangling from his hips. As he took the top of her dress, Paula guided him as she raised her arms, letting him pull off the pink outfit and lie it close by. She gave a sheepish laugh, cheeks turning pink; all that was left was under garments. Poo leaned to kiss her again, and she noted the increased heat with her arms around his bare back, paralyzed at the snap of her bra and it falling away from her arms and chest...

She saw Poo's eyes soften, and he rested his lips upon her neck. Paula smiled and held an arm around him, using the other to sneak beneath the front of his pants. Poo shuddered, and Paula's fingers continued to tease, fondling the shape she already grown so fond of. His forehead pressed to her neck, his braid dangling to the side. Her hand traced the prince's spine, again slinking beneath cloth; she tugged the edge, the entire gi draping around him to the floor, leaving him in nothing but braid and tan skin. 

_If you make the slightest moan..._

He would've lost it then. A tiny whimper would've given him away… he breathed deeply, leveling his forehead between Paula's breasts. He had to think—it was difficult to, caught in the moment like this. He had to do something to distract his own pleasure, but give his mistress heaven; he trembled, his palm cupping the left breast, listening to Paula for signs of discomfort. There was a hum of content; fingers traced her nipple, rousing her excitement. Finally, he teased and sucked, squeals of glee coming from his friend. It _did_ feel nice... it did put him in a sense of ease. Shortly, it was all he thought about.

Panting, Paula lightly moved over, letting him take the other breast by the hand. The gentle wetness engulfed it too; her fingers played with Poo's braid, her eyes heavy and woozy. She cried aloud, Poo's tongue tracing a white-hot line between her breasts, leaving kisses here and there… and one right over her heart. His hands slid along her hips, brushing his nose above her navel, sighing, resting... breathing the scent of her. It was a comfortable scent. His hands searched for sensitive spots, tickling them so that Paula may laugh. His tongue slipped in her navel, a gorgeous tune filling his ears. Suddenly, Paula leaned back and parted her legs, leaving the prince paralyzed and speechless.

"I... I can't do this."  
"Poo?"  
"I can't! It's—It's dishonorable."  
"Poo, there was a reason I stepped forward."  
"But—!"  
"Poo, it's okay... there's nothing wrong. You have my consent." She watched him with warm blue eyes. "Relax Poo. We're friends, right? Maybe even more than that."  
The prince hesitated. "I..."  
"It's all right." Paula sat up, supporting Poo's head. She guided Poo's hand, pulling away her underwear until it joined the heap of clothes on the floor. "There... oh!"

It was a sharp "oh!" for she let Poo's face come forward; sweetness tingled his senses, and he tentatively reached his tongue for the moist folds of skin… she squealed, letting go and falling back on the bed. More and more opened for him, when the prince came across the clitoris; Paula screamed, and he knew this was the place. Poo caressed it, swirled around it, lived for it, breathed for it, beckoned to it—beckoned to Paula and her wails. She tingled and convulsed, fighting and strangling under intense tingling euphoria, until she was unable to take it anymore. With a final scream, she came.

It was a blow to the mind…! It left a gash that quaked from the inner regions of her temples, every little sensitive tendon, and the heaven her hips experienced... it wasn't so much Paula stared at the wall than she had _become_ the wall. Her thoughts glazed as her head carried across another galaxy, fiery bulbs of light formed pink clouds with their explosive deaths, debris caught in the glare and shining like spilt glitter. Something in her cerebellum simmered, and shaved off the layers until she again returned to coherent thought, huffing silently as her inquisitive blue eyes met Poo's.

"Poo..." Paula murmured, letting him recover before she sat up. "That... that was--"  
"I failed."  
"Well—! I was going to say, _wow..._ just... wow."

The prince bowed before his mistress, a salty-sweetness lingering on his lips. The air condensed around him, and it seemed easier to fall. Still, he returned an appreciative smile to Paula.

"I've failed to fulfill my training." he said in the tone of someone who knew he'd be late catching the bus. "Master knew—and expected me to fail. But it's not all. I..."

"What do you mean?" Poo kissed her in the mouth, and a different jolt overtook her arms. A warmer glow shivered her goosebumps, like a normal towel washed in a machine, fluffier and comfier than before… and it was the same towel. Like a perfectly good hamburger could be changed with a packet of Deli sauce...

But that's strange. If he truly failed, he would've blacked out and been summoned before his master.

Then again, he was naked. Not a good idea for the prince to wear a birthday suit in front of the court.

He didn't want to disappoint her. The prince wasn't used to initiate hugging, so holding her arms was most he could do. His shoulders fell, and a tart tongue greeted him inside his mouth; jumping back to the scene, he caught up with Paula, tongues tangled beneath exquisite flavor. He followed her via a gap of steamed breath, exploring the palate of Paula's mouth. There was an exchange of curling caresses, before they pulled away and sighed deeply, prince and teacher gazing at each other.

"I don't see why you have to worry so much."

Poo said nothing. So Paula took him by the shoulders and rolled atop of him. The prince grunted in surprise, trying to writhe himself free… but for her small body and slim arms, Ms. Polestar was tough, and who KNOWS what she could do with these hands. It was useless to fight back; he could only lean hard against the sheets, Paula's grip loosened as she hovered above his skin. She tapped her finger on Poo's nose, grinning.

"Let's see... I think I'll handle things for now.” A pink blush adorned her cherry cheeks. “Will you accompany me?"  
"...As you wish."

Those three words held a lot of power for the other person, and even more so in the bedroom; his mouth gaped slightly, wet warmth stroking down his neck. Paula's tongue had a little electricity to it, the pleasure keeping him pinned as he could do nothing but raise his head, bearing more of himself for her. Her hand traced the prince's sweaty forehead, palm stroking his head and braid. As Paula's lips returned to his, salt intermingled among Poo's tastebuds. He craved for more and she obeyed, exploring his mouth and leaving it impossible to breathe… then the blonde-haired girl rested her head beneath his shoulder, nuzzling nose down tan skin. A small bump caught her interest, and as she teased the nipple, Poo shuddered.

As the tip of her tongue swirled, she sneaked a small suck, fingers crawling over the prince's shoulders for support. Immobile, the most he could do was keep her level with his chest, as she nibbled, probed… breathing softly, Paula moved herself up, nudging one of her breasts against him, fingers playing between her nipple and his. She rested her forehead a moment, hands around bare hips, creeping along thighs and closing in... slowly... she hesitated a moment. She reached her hand for his hardness, Poo's heart beating frantically beneath his ribcage, desperate scared eyes like a child watching her, never looking away; Paula lowered her head and sucked.

The prince gasped, clawing the sheets as he tried to gain balance… give room for Paula. He hung his head low, watching hazily from half-lidded eyes. Paula's hands covered the shaft, and as she pulled away, she sighed a sweet breath and let the tip of her tongue slide and breathe in the musk, and taste him and take him...

"P-Paula..."

Poo's hand nestled on her shoulder, fingers combing her hair and caressing her cheek. A fuzzy calm dissolved inside him, despite his breaths pushing harder and harder to keep him on the brink of sanity. His hips felt weightless and _wonderful,_ and the tingle spread across him like he was becoming one with the light...

"Poo... could you please hand me one of those condoms? I think we're ready."

He didn't want her to stop. But the spell was broken; with a nod, he let her withdraw, Paula catching runaway drops of white as they begun to emerge. He stretched his hand in the box, taking out a small packet and giving it to the blonde. Stretching the latex and checking for holes, Paula found none and pinched the top, fitting it carefully over Poo's erection. When she was done, she lain the prince back on the bed, kissing him. Poo embraced her back, rubbing her body against his and breathing her fragrance; their hands ran along wet skin, and Paula finally sat up on Poo's stomach, watching him as he gazed back in wonder. Panting, she backed up, feeling the hardness rub against delicate folds. Her arms braced and her hair clinging to her back and shoulders, her expression was tight but determined. Like the rip of a band-aid, she sat, plunging herself over him.

There was a cut cry, following by shaky whispers of hurt. Paula was no newcomer to pain, and through her journey with Ness and her friends, is was likely there would've been tears from rigorous fighting and exercise. But it wasn't enough to stop the sharp searing... Poo leaned forward in concern, his friend's face puffy and voice tripping on gasps and sobs.

"Paula...?"  
"Ithurtsithurts...!" she hissed. "So goodow... feels good... owou... just wait..." 

She raised a hand to signal the prince to lie back down. She lifted herself slowly... as soon as she felt the ridges of the tip, she pulled down again. The pain still made her wince, but as she repeated the process, the burn faded and spikes of pleasure started to course her insides... wiping an escaped tear with a finger and a giggle, she beckoned Poo to follow suit.

With a moan, the prince started to move. His hips screamed for more, to go faster than any limit has ever reached, but he waited for Paula's signal first. Her pinning him from above, he would follow her on every whim and command…! When Paula started to hum and look relaxed, he thrust a little faster; an excited squeal perused from her lips, and she followed him to keep the rhythm. He was driven by instinct, as was she: Poo reveled in the spikes, the electricity coursing him, the tight silk from being inside her, her body lean and pale and gorgeous, the pink of her cheeks and nipples, the movement of her breasts, the twinkle in her marine eyes... screams of joy resonated her, and she pleaded for Poo to go faster, _faster...!_ If his throat weren't caught in animalistic moans, he would've been _laughing..._ he honestly never felt this happy in so long. Grinning like he never thought possible, it took one final push when Paula was death-still, pinnacles of ecstasy seizing her whole.

God... god... _god...!_ With a weak cry, the prince released inside of her, head washed in delicious heat and gentle melodies. While he lay in this out-of-body experience, Paula had recovered and withdrawn, pulling out the condom, tying it up and throwing it away. She lay completely over Poo, nuzzling beneath his shoulder as his climax faded. She smiled, listening to him breathe and his arms around her again… she was tired, but a good kind of tired. Poo was already asleep. Pulling up the blanket, she snuggled themselves beneath the sheets, and gave Poo a kiss on the cheek before laying her head and closing her eyes.

~

Inside the Dalaam Palace, Poo and Paula had cleaned up and were back wearing their regular clothes. Poo’s Master nodded, his expression stoic as he faced the pupil and the blonde.

“Hello Prince Poo.”  
“Hello Master.”  
“Thanks for cleaning the sheets, by the way.” His master bowed politely. “Ahem, so Poo. It has hereby decreed that—”  
“Please!” Paula cried. “You mustn’t fault him!”  
“All of Dalaam could hear you two, and you don’t need a Mike. Is that right?”  
“…Yes Master.”  
“Prince Poo, because you SCREAMED while having sex with a woman, I hereby declare…”

Paula continued to protest with no avail as the prince lowered his head in grim acceptance.

Poo’s Master grin was bigger than Buddha’s. “You passed!”  
The couple stood baffled. “…What?”  
“It’s important to follow your master’s teachings, Prince Poo. But there’s ONE rule that you can’t break about having sex (aside from wearing a condom), and it’s to be LOUD!”  
“M-Master!?”  
“I was traveling the other day, and I met this dog named Ruffini.” Poo’s Master’s fingers rested upon his chin in contemplation. “He told me I should visit the Toppolla Theater, so I could receive a special showing of Avenue Q.”

“…”  
“Perhaps you shall teleport and see for yourselves. Best of luck to you both!”

Paula shrugged. “I guess we might as well go…”


End file.
